End of Days

I'm sad to say that my husband's Grandfather died last night after a long, debilitating struggle with his health. Although I never knew him as a well man, and he declined drastically in the time I knew him, when he was lucid, his personality was warm, sweet, and funny. My kids, particularly my youngest, enjoyed him, and I'm glad they had the opportunity to know him, even in the limited capacity of his illness.

As I said, his abilities declined rapidly during the years I've known him. He didn't seem to enjoy life, when he was aware of it, anymore. His care has been taking a serious toll on Grandmother, his loving wife and caregiver. For her sake, I will not say what seems obvious to me. However, I will say that, now that he has gone to the eternal rest, I hope she will take some time to rest, heal, and grieve. I'm not quite sure what she is going to do with herself without him there, needing her.

My husband has been mourning the man he knew as a child for a long time. Jason felt that his Grandfather no longer had the quality of life he deserved, that his dignity was being stripped away at a time when he should be basking in the light of a life well-lived. It was painful for him to see his Grandfather's mind and health fail, to see his memories flee and the confusion in his eyes when he looked at his family.

I hope he has gone to something better, even if that is a simple end to pain, to confusion and fear, to struggle. I hope Grandmother, my mother- and father-in-law, and Aunt Sandy bear this as well as they can. They all have a strong faith, and a loving family. I hope it is enough.

We'll miss you, Grampa.

Love,
~Jeannie